If you ask my husband what his favorite flavor of Kool aid is he'll tell you it's red. Anyone see the problem here? Yep! That's it, red, isn't a flavor it's a color. It's a long running joke in our family.
We were laying around this afternoon, because he wrecked his back this weekend and after spending the day alone in the house with no one but the dog to talk to. The man needed company and someone to talk to. So I made the easiest comfort food available, mac and cheese and discovered I had Kool aid in my pantry.
Which reminded me of a conversation a co worker and I had recently. He's taking a class on gender. In the process of our conversation he told myself and another co worker that he wasn't brought up to talk about feelings. So much so, that when asked how he was doing during a particularly difficult time, he replied "I'm ok, I'm doing fine."
The person asking, pointed put to him that, Good and Fine weren't actually feelings.
And they aren't. Good and Fine are not emotions they are words we tend to use to deflect attention from our emotions. We are taught to buck up, to keep a stiff upper lip. When we should be encouraged to explore our feelings. Not so we become emotional puddles on the floor, but so we can express ourselves freely and without fear of censure simply because we dare to feel.